Friday, October 10, 2008

Ode to Mr. serious security guard

There is always a security guard on duty where I work. Who it is, changes twice daily during my shift. Since we have to walk pass the security desk each time we use the restroom, I've become familiar with many of them. Most are friendly, some a little quirky, but there's this one...Mr. Serious.

I've been working here over a year, but he still looks at my badge every time he's working. I'm not the only one either. He makes people show their badges that have been working over here like 10+ years. He doesn't smile. He's rigid to policy – heck, I think he even makes up some of his own rules. You know the type, he was the hall monitor in high school and he got a thrill out of it.

Then there's his walkie-talkie. He keeps that thing turned up so loud, Helen Keller could hear it. I detest those obnoxious nextel phones that beep with each sentence, and you have to listen to not one, but both sides, of the conversation. The people with those phones are always shouting into them. Well, Mr. Serious has all of you outdone.

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teg said...

I hate those Nextel phones, too. And you've heard how much Mr. Serious bothers me. I call him "Cologne Man" however because on the dreaded days when he comes back to my office, I get a terrible headache from the smell...and it lingers for hours...
Don't you particularly love how he'll say, "I need to see your badge, Your Name." So he obviously knows you belong here! One day I didn't have my badge and he made me stand there while he called the main security office to ask PERMISSION to give me a temporary badge. I was thinking, Hey, I'll just go home!

KATHY said...

yep - he calls me by name then asks for my badge. I guess it's in case they fired me yesterday? He's probably one of the reasons I didn't get my name changed on my badge for a year after my marriage - b/c he wanted me to. I'm surprised he didn't have me arrested. I got so frustrated the last time he asked to see it - after calling me by name - that I took a leap and said I would bring it back when I got to my desk and put all my sh*t down. OK - I didn't say "sh*t" but I wanted to. He followed me to my office - which is right behind his wall. I was daring him, in my mind, to pull his gun, but he didn't. I was almost disappointed. What do you think he would actually do if someone dangerous stepped off the elevator? I hope we don't ever have to find out. I appreciate security but if they can call you by name - really?!!

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